It’s the new year’s resolution so many people make, yet the one that does so much damage to our mental and physical health: that resolution to go on a diet.
Here are two reasons to ditch the diet - not just for new year, but for good.
#1: Diets don’t work
There is a lot of evidence that diets don’t work. Not only that, they actually make us fatter in the long term. Someone who’s been on lots of diets will end up at a higher weight than someone who has never dieted. This is because diets foster an unhealthy relationship with food and encourage us not to listen to what our bodies need. The facts are explained in Megan Jayne Crabbe’s book, Body Positive Power, which is well worth a read. If you want more of the science behind it, I recommend Big Fat Lies by Glenn A Gaesser, which explains it all in an accessible way that will have you chucking your scales in the bin.
#2: Diets are bad for our mental health
This one is obvious but don’t discount it. When you are living a reality where you’re depriving yourself based on not feeling that you’re good enough, your mental health is going to take a battering. This is one of the reasons diets are so hard to maintain - life’s so much nicer when you’re allowed to listen to your body and have what you need. Besides, you can’t expect your brain to work optimally and to be able to manage your emotions if you are in a state of undernourishment.
What you can choose instead…
#1: Eat what you want and need
What if you let yourself eat what you want and need all the time? If this is something you’re not used to doing, you might think you’d go wild and double in size, but actually most people who try this really don’t. They begin to tune into what their bodies need and it turns out our bodies are pretty reliable barometers once we listen to them. Susie Orbach has written a great book called On Eating explaining more about how to eat this way.
If this is not something that works for you, you can try to feed yourself based on how a kind friend or a nurturing parent would feed you. If you’re used to punishing yourself for what you eat, or have strict rules for yourself on what’s OK and what’s not, try replacing that punitive voice with a supportive one. This will take practise because you may have been treating yourself this way for a long time, maybe ever since you were very young. But ways of thinking can be changed - you can make this your new year’s resolution, and get support from a therapist if you need it.
#2: Stop judging bodies
Do you silently (or worse, loudly) judge those around you for what they eat and how they look? It’s not your fault if you do - we’re all conditioned to do this by our fat shaming society and the messages we get from the media. But we can decide to stop it. We’re never going to be able to extend kindness towards our own bodies if we are dishing out judgements elsewhere, so let it go.
#3: Start being kind to your own body
We can all be judgemental about others, but often the harshest criticism is reserved for ourselves. How do you talk to yourself when you look in the mirror, or get dressed to go out? Are you positive and kind? Or do you tear yourself down and only see your faults? If you are able to practise thinking more acceptingly about others, this is a good start, and is often easier than trying to change your self-critical thoughts. You can then gradually begin to turn this acceptance inwards, towards yourself. You won’t change things overnight, but I promise you that it is a habit you can make stick with practise. Take the emphasis away from how you look and shine it towards how you feel and what your body can do.
Changing our mindset about our food and bodies is difficult but it is worth it. Hating our bodies takes up so much mental space, because there’s no getting away from your own body is there? So making friends with it naturally makes every aspect of life a lot nicer.
If, most of the time, you eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full, and do some kind of moderate, regular exercise that makes you feel good, you will settle at the weight that’s right for you. BMI alone doesn’t tell us what this weight is. A lot of other factors - like age, gender, life stage, hormone levels, general health, genetics - come into it. But you will stop yo-yoing up and down the scales and come to rest in the body that’s comfortable for you. And that’s not just for new year - that body will be with you for life.
Make friends with your body for life